I’m sorry, but God is out of control.
It’s alarming, but clear to see.
He’s embarking on more and more projects each day
Without consulting me.
What I think it would be wise to do
Is to section him off, on his own
In a place where His schemes can play out to the full
But He’ll chiefly be ‘Home Alone’.
He’s forever creating scenarios
Where the characters live as they will
And do what they like from morning till night
But, I ask you, who’s paying the bill?
Well, it’s all of us, angels who’ll have to serve
So Man can live his life of lerve
Well I’m sorry. I think it’s a bit of a cheek
You don’t see us offered a day off a week.
Yes, I know we’ve eternity too to be fair
But just think for a minute, where will it stop?
All God’s constructs are complex, ingenious too
And I think there’s some purpose behind it, don’t you?
And I’m more than convinced that He has in mind
A plan that would leave us way behind.
A project that’s simply so absurd
I can’t even describe it
I’ve not got the word.
So what I would suggest
That we do for the best
Is that each of you angels reports
On the things that you see
And relays them to me
And we’ll see what old Luci can sort.
Yes I know He’s content, but that worries me too.
It just shows that He can’t be thinking things through.
It proves there must be something amiss.
For instance, what do you make of this?
I clearly confronted Him over His plan
For this matter based spirit that he likes to call Man
And I asked about purpose?
He said it was ‘Love’
And referred to some fantasy friend he called ‘Dove’
It’s embarrassing, really, how much more should we take?
I refer to my first point, it’s for His own sake.
We’ll just have him sectioned in a heavenly home
And hope that He’ll learn to see sense on His own.
Then we can relieve Him of all of the stress
Take over the Kingdom in a way He would bless
If He still had the vision
And the structures we need
With responsible roles and a way to proceed.
We need to be sure what to do and to think
Without all this teetering over a brink of explosive potential and passion and risk
So, to conclude, let’s be brisk
We’ll just have Him sectioned in a heavenly home
And hope that He’ll learn to see sense on His own
Renamed and restructured,
The Kingdom will be such an absolute Haven
You won’t need to be free!
Even God will be jealous of Our perfect control.
He’ll want to be in here, and apply for a role!
But no, seriously, we’ll keep him safely out there,
Cos he’d only upset things, and it wouldn’t be fair.
So, how about a new name for the Kingdom as well?
It should sound quite like Heaven, but more punchy,
Sarah de Nordwall